Welcome back to Fatimah Files, your favorite mental health column (I assume)! With the semester winding down and summer lingering close by, many of us are certainly looking forward to not being swamped with assignments, projects, and the pressures of our academic identities.
Yet, we don’t talk about the changes that come with the end of the semester. It can range from already missing your friends who are about to graduate, to realizing you’re one step closer to leaving the safe bubble of college.
Then, summer is here before you know it; this should be a time of relaxation and rest, but you can’t help but think, “What do I do now?” I’m in this weird place where I’m so glad this semester is almost over, but I’m not exactly excited to have months of mostly unstructured time. Oh, but rest assured, I have fun plans of … working retail to fill the summer malaise.
I’m already having professors ask if I’ll be doing anything fun or exciting, and I feel so awkward telling them that I’m just working. I want to say, “Yes, Dr./Professor [insert name], I will be embarking on a thrill-seeking road trip to my job, just 10 minutes from my house.”
Summer has been the best/worst time for me because it can be hard to detach from the school version of myself. My entire personality isn’t Moravian, but I’ve grown so attached to the community that it can be hard leaving it. Whether it’s just for the summer or when I eventually graduate, I struggle to grasp the concept.
If last summer taught me anything, it’s that you are the master of your own plans. Will those plans always work? No, but you have a gap of time to figure out what will. When dealing with summertime sadness or summer blues, it’s important to recognize the agency you have and how you react to change.
When it comes to my friends who are graduating, I know some of them live nearby, and staying in touch doesn’t have to be a Herculean task. Even if post-grad leads them to faraway places, it can never hurt to shoot a message once in a while, asking them how they’re doing or even bringing up a memory you had with them.
Another thing that can definitely ease away a sluggish summer is picking up a hobby – I know this sounds so obvious, right? But, I mean picking a hobby a month, ideally. Don’t go crazy trying to pick up pottery, crocheting, sewing, or cooking all at once. Start with one and invest time in it. Make it your baby! Nurture it until you feel comfortable, to see how you can expand your horizons elsewhere.
I want to continue getting better at making earrings, so I might want to dedicate time each week to hone my craft. I also really want to pick up calligraphy and soap-making, but again, I don’t want to overwhelm myself with things I think I can do all at once. That’s how you end up with analysis paralysis and overthinking the problem of what would be the best use of your time.
Let summer drive your ambitions and pull you in new directions you’ve been dying to explore. Even if you know things will be different and strange in the coming semester, now is your time to live in the here and now and keep yourself reassured through the trenches of summer.
I’ve been constantly worrying about my last semester (a year from now, mind you) when I’ll be on the cusp of real adulthood. My friends and boyfriend in education will be student teaching while I’ll figure out what post-grad will look like for me, or get used to not seeing them every day. Paramore once said, “Ain’t it fun living in the real world?” and I don’t think it’s very fun to think about what comes after college.
Here’s the thing: I’ve got an entire summer ahead of me, and I still will have time with them. There is nothing stopping me from planning hangouts or even weekend beach trips.
In these next few months away from school and away from relentlessly checking my emails, I want to enjoy the patches of freedom I have left and how I can finally make the time I’ve been craving mine. Writing this column has taught me that control is a balancing act between what’s realistic and what you’re desperately wanting. I think it’s realistic that I want to choose a summer to ration time for myself with time for my loved ones.
Signing off for now, see you next semester! Stay sane (and cool), friends!
