Photo courtesy of Lola Offenback

I’m unsure why anyone in their right might jump on an elevator, but I question a lot about humanity nowadays. 

Fun fact: elevators are essential for people with disabilities, blind and invisible, and two seconds of fun while jumping is not worth temporarily breaking this critical structure. I didn’t think I would have to say this, but please, don’t jump on elevators. 

In addition to being crucial for those with disabilities, they’re also pretty efficient to use as well. Don’t feel like going up four sets of stairs? Elevator. Running late to catch the shuttle? Elevator. 

Plus, these people are idiots. There are cameras everywhere, especially in the elevator, and they don’t even hide them! The cameras are very visible! When the elevator suddenly breaks, campus administrators will definitely review the footage and find the responsible parties.

If the elevator breaks with them stuck on it too, they have immediately incriminated themselves. Why commit a crime you can’t even run away from? And you don’t even get any benefits from it? I genuinely cannot understand. 

In addition, RAs put a lot of time and effort into preparing bulletin boards, door signs, and other decorations for their halls, and people have absolutely no idea how much work goes into these, or worse, they don’t care. 

It boggles my mind when I see people take down their handmade RA door tags since I still have mine from freshmen year and orientation. Even those who decide to take them down often do them extremely rudely as well. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen crumbled name signs on the floor or the remnants of someone tearing down a bulletin board.

It’s one thing to take down the signs, but to litter in the hallway, leaving a mess for residence staff and facilities workers is just rude. And leaving the evidence of destroying an RA’s hard work on the floor right in front of their dorm? Have some common decency. 

I haven’t even brought up the people screaming in the dorms around me, blocking people in their suites with furniture (a huge safety, security, and fire hazard), and smoking indoors. Yeah, residence life is hard. 

In addition, the shuttle etiquette is a nightmare. I thought this was common knowledge, but if you are waiting to board a shuttle, you are supposed to let everyone on board depart before you shove your way through them to grab a seat. I can’t even count how many times I’ve been trying to get off the shuttle, and a ton of people already started to get on, so I have to do the awkward body-touching shimmy past them. It is so uncomfortable. Please let people get off the shuttle before you board it. 

Life is hard enough for South campus residents when there was no parking available under the Hill to Hill bridge, more commonly known as the Spring Street Lot, due to the upcoming Celtic Classic. Especially once all the side streets are shut down, and the lot that students were referred to by Campus Police is both full and half-barricaded with No Parking signs.

In addition, there were no signs saying “student/faculty parking only,” which could have protected Lot U from Celtic Classic guests parking and tailgating in that lot. I saw hordes of people dressed in kilts using our parking, and don’t get me wrong, it’s a fun time! But that is my parking lot, and I’m pretty sure they are not allowed to literally tailgate there. And yet, there’s no campus police to give out tickets during that time. Again, I go to Celtic Classic every year to support vendors (and support myself by getting some delicious perogies,) but I still want to have access to a parking lot within a mile of my dorm. 

Music professors even received an email on Friday urging them to cancel their classes, as the parking situation was much worse than imagined. This isn’t fair to the students or the faculty, and something needs to be done to change this. Almost all of my friends had to pay $10 daily for the parking garage, and those like me who refused to pay that fee just had to go home for the weekend. 

I’m just tired of moving my car back and forth just to receive another email saying I have to walk a mile in the dark to move my car to another parking lot. It’s a week past the festival’s start, and I still don’t have access to the Spring Street lot and never received a response to the email I sent asking Campus Police where to park in lieu of all of the closed, full, and barricaded lots. 

Celtic Classic is a great time, but the parking situation has us all emotionally and physically exhausted. We don’t need this extra ruckus in our life, especially now.